Conan Obrien and his Irish Shadow

imaj: On GooglePlus from a closed account but Sooooo worth it anyway.

Conan is my spirit animal.

Conan and Coyote

imaj: ImNewsGhost via TeamCoco

Happy Sundog, everybody! Hope all your coyote mornings are as adorable as this one. What sweet nothings can Conan O’Brien be whispering in that puppy’s ear? She looks completely underage!

imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: Coco as a leprechaun: artist Sandy Copeland on Etsy (yes, you can buy it!); Kiefer: TMZ

Those boys know how to celebrate! Remember, people: friends don’t let friends drink green beer.

Speaking of which, there will never be a better time for me to tell the infamous Leprechaun Nun Joke.

So, Paddy and his friend…Bobo…yeah, Paddy and Bobo were walking down the street, rather slowly, for they were definitely having one of those morning-after-the-night-before type of days, and they see a nun walking towards them, which is not so unusual as you might suppose, what with them being Irish and this being a dirty St. Patrick’s Day joke and all.

So Paddy slaps Bobo in the arm and says, “Faith, lad, here’s the very ting! Sure an’ we’ll ask the nun!” and Bobo just sort of groans and nods, so Paddy, he walks right up to the nun, bold as brass for he’d seen them before and not just in The Flying Nun reruns either.

“Sister,” says Paddy, he says, “Do ye have a moment to settle a dispute between me friend and me self?”

“I do, my son,” says the Sister, all polite and ladylike-like, for that’s how they were in the old days when nuns weren’t always dropping from helicopters into the Amazon to convert the boa constrictors and appearin’ on reality tv all in a day’s work and what-all like they do nowadays.

“Sister,” says Paddy, “Is there such thing as a Leprechaun Nun?”

This sets her back a bit. “Leprechaun Nun? Why, Paddy, noooo, there never was such a thing as a Leprechaun Nun. Whatever put such a thought in your head?”

And Paddy, he doesn’t reply for a second, he just smacks his friend Bobo on the arm again and says, “See! I told you that was a penguin you were fucking last night!”

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imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: HaveUHeard

Yes, once again I take the lazy way out and copy/paste the links I did at Ayyyy. My excuse this time? I spent THREE HOURS doing that link post and updating the blogroll, and it’s Miller Time (or at least Rickards Red Time, as I wouldn’t be caught dead drinking American “beer”)!

Liquid Cocktail guaranteed to pump up your pumpkins (MakeYourGardenGrow)

Hot Caption Action! (Ayyyy)

Celebrities! They’re not like us! They can walk in these shoes! (CelebToast)

The best 404 message online (AgentBedhead)

Om Nom Nom WHA???? (AllieIsWired)

Brittany Murphy, Casey Johnson, Basic Health Rules laid to rest (AmyGrindhouse)

Demon in sheep’s clothing (BWE)

Anne Hathaway flips the bird (BricksAndStones)

Alexis for Alexis! (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ooh La Little Girl Lingerie? (LaughingStork)

Kate, I think you dropped something (HolyMoly)

Sandra Bullock will cut a bitch (LitelySalted)

Forget Mischa Barton, try Carole Channing! (LaineyGossip)

Kristen Stewart in court for prostitution (TMZ)

Ralph Lauren snubs in public! (CelebrityMound)

Ellen for President? (CelebrityDirtyLaundry)

Tom Brady’s 2-month-old can run??? (CelebrityBabyScoop)

Oooh, ACDC MUST DIE!!!! (CeleBitchy)

Jay-Qui? (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Possibly the most terrifying headline I’ve ever read (CelebritySmack)

Kanye survives horrifying ordeal (CelebSlam)

Bublé‘s bongo bowl (CityRag)

Dennis Quaid’s farmer’s tan (CrazyDaysAndNights)

The Real BabyMamas of Atlanta (Crunk+Disorderly)

Brangelina lives! (DailyStab)

Paris has gone to the dogs (DanasDirt)

Nicknames of the literati (Gawker)

The return of PuppyBowl (DListed)

Betty White is terrifying (EvilBeet)

Small Wonder it was cancelled (FourFour)

Janet Jackson is a Janet Jackson impersonator (GabbyBabble)

Best Dressed/Worst Dressed at the Grammys (GoFugYourself)

Snooki’s makeover (ImBringingBloggingBack)

Qween no longer on Scene (INeedMyFix)

How Hugh Jackman rolls (HaveUHeard)

World’s most expensive benchwarmers (HollywoodBackwash)

Flack pointedly does NOT deny Paris Hilton is dumb (HollywoodRag)

Sniff Beyonce for $50 (HollywoodTuna)

KFat achieves self-awareness (ImNotObsessed)

Leif Garrett busted NOT A FLASHBACK TO 1975 (Janet CharltonsHollywood)

Virgins versus Texting! (JustJared)

PETA vs Avatar (Movieline)

Jessica Biel definitely not Jewish (FitCeleb)

Frances Bean taking singing lessons (PerezHilton)

Stock Anderson Cooper Adorable Story (PinkIsTheNewBlog)

Russell Brand shoots, scores (UKPopSugar)

Jamaican Bobsled Team not so cool (WizBangPop)

Orlando Bloom is all wet (PopBytes)

Kelly Clarkson in flamewar (RadarOnline)

Re-Enchanted (SeriouslyOMG)

Tila says the butler didn’t do it (ASocialiteLife)

Conan O’Brien’s Valentine to Britney (SquareEyes)

Saffy, darling, are you slumming in this movie? (TenGossip)

John Mayer needs to take off the Wayfarers (TheBosh)

Mischa Barton wins Best Supporting Hose (TheSkinny)

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imaj: Clay Larson

Sooo, rather than go through all the best gossip sites on the web twice in one day, I thought I’d be lazy and just copy and paste in the links I wrote for Ayyyy, especially because today I was really clever and went with a theme and I’m so, so very proud of myself. So, without further ado, here are your unspeakably hot gossip links for Wednesday. You’ll need a drink to cool you down!

The yummy-sounding Quiet but Quick cocktail (1001Cocktails)

Siskel shushes Ebert (Movieline)

M is for Muffle It, Heidi (AgentBedhead)

Shut Your Mouth! Elijah Wood is 29 (AmyGrindhouse)

Mad Man murdered by silence (BusyBeeBlogger)

Ben wants Jen to STFU (CeleBitchy)

Cows take Kiefer for a ride (PopEater)

Tina Turner is HOW old? Shut up! (CelebritySmack)

Say What? (DailyStab)

Monjack seeks to gag WarnerBrothers (DListed)

Amy Winehouse erases Blake (HolyMoly)

Things Jennifer Aniston DIDN’T say (PopBytes)

Denise Van Outen speaks in code (UKPopSugar)

Mariah’s dress covers her hidden charms (CityRag)

Hugh Jackman speaks! (LitelySalted)

Diddy did? I’m speechless (LaughingStork)

Clare Danes speaks for the autistic (INeedMyFix)

Pete Doherty continues to be unspeakable (CrazyDays&Nights)

Jay Leno hasn’t spoken to Conan (EvilBeet)

Ugly Betty silenced (GabbyBabble)

Alicia Keys has no comment (INO)

NBC slides Conan some hush money? (JustJared)

Zelda Rubenstein has gone dark (Movieline)

Jon Voight wants you to STFU HATERZ (PerezHilton)

Mariah shouldn’t talk! (ASL)

Lance Bass is quietly emo (TenGossip)

Chris Matthews puts his foot in his mouth (Gawker)