Michael Jackson for Prostate Health Week

imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: Reuters via Picapp

Michael Jackson died one year ago today. Do you think he went thattaway?

From the really terrible, awful, bad joke department:

Farrah Fawcett died the same day as MJ, a few hours sooner. She reached the Pearly Gates and God was there to meet her, excitedly shoving a long-suffering St Peter out of the way to shake the hand of the blonde bombshell.

“Hi Farrah, I’m God! I’m your biggest fan!” he said, excitedly.

“Gosh, God, that’s terrific. I love my fans. Here, let me sign your toga…” she replied, whipping out a fountain pen. God giggled.

“Farrah, I’m never going to wash this toga again! You’ve made me so happy, I’d like to grant you a wish. Anything you want, just tell me and I’ll make it happen.”

“Gee, God, I guess I’d like for all the little children of the world to be safe.”

And WHAM! Just like that Michael Jackson died.

Jake Gyllenhaal Prince of Pervia

imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: for the pic, HuffingtonPost God help me I thought I’d never link to the Huffpo, but if I link to DListed one more time MichaelK will think I’m stalking him. for the caption, KatharineHolmes, in whose honour I used this funky-looking font.

And hey, kinda looks like Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands daggers, right? Sure.

Psst: if you’re a gossip blogger who’d rather drink than link, drop me a line; I’m offering a 3-5x a week link service.

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Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and me (Jasperante)

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• Jake Gyllenhaal stole my identity and my video game (thepunch.com.au)

Drag King Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow get their grope on

imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: DListed

FIRE THAT SHERPA! The news of His Serene Highness Prince Albert‘s engagement has obviously snapped something in Gwyneth Paltrow‘s head; in a desperate attempt to cadge a title before her estrogen dries up, this desperate social climber clings to any handy crossdresser in the belief that a drag king has a real title. Should we tell her Madonna‘s not really a king? She probably already knows she’s not a real singer.

Obama has some words for McChrystal. Words he stole from Darth Vader.

imaj: Wonkette via theoriginaljoefisher via cvxn

In related news…who even knew he was Catholic?

If you’re a gossip blogger who’d rather be drinking than linking, drop me an email at raincoaster at gmail dot com. I’m offering an affordable new link outsourcing service.

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lady gaga trip tych

imaj: Lolebrity
sorse: Gawker actually I stole the joke from Dr Dasher

Lady Gaga‘s whole life has been leading to this moment. Let’s face it: there’s no song she could sing, no show she could stage, that could top this for sheer, blissful, multi-orgasmic Schadenfreude.

If your life just doesn’t have enough falling-flat-on-its-face pwnage, you might want to slip on these sessy Giuseppe Zanotti boots and get your dom on (the floor).

zanotti boots from Zappos